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An interactive forum for the sharing of original works of literature (e.g. poems, novels, short stories, essays).
 
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 Rainfall (WaywithWords)

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Pen&Paper
Wordsmith



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Join date : 2008-07-06
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PostSubject: Rainfall (WaywithWords)   Rainfall (WaywithWords) I_icon_minitimeTue Jul 15, 2008 3:40 am

I'm not a poet at heart, but I shall give some non-expert opinions on this haiku anyway.

I think the poem is kinda like opposite to its title. The title is Rainfall but your poem is about a lack of rain, which is contradictory. I don't think that's supposed to be. It isn't very long, so there aren't any other mistakes to point out. Nice try!
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DayDreamer
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DayDreamer


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PostSubject: Re: Rainfall (WaywithWords)   Rainfall (WaywithWords) I_icon_minitimeTue Jul 15, 2008 11:45 am

It's likely contradictory for a reason. If it was titled something that suggested it was about lack of rain, like 'Drought' for instance, we'd know what was coming and it wouldn't have much of a impact. By calling it 'Rainfall' and describing a lack of rain, it makes you stop and notice the contradiction, and thus the poem occupies more time in your active memory and makes a more lasting impression - which is particularly important for such a short piece.
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Pen&Paper
Wordsmith



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Join date : 2008-07-06
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PostSubject: Re: Rainfall (WaywithWords)   Rainfall (WaywithWords) I_icon_minitimeTue Jul 15, 2008 11:02 pm

Ooooh...that's a nice trick then, Way.
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WaywithWords
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WaywithWords


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PostSubject: Re: Rainfall (WaywithWords)   Rainfall (WaywithWords) I_icon_minitimeWed Jul 16, 2008 9:24 pm

Actually I hadn't meant it to be intentionally contradictory, but that is a good way of looking at it. Often, our mistakes are what others find the most interesting. Thank you both for your thoughts.
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PostSubject: Re: Rainfall (WaywithWords)   Rainfall (WaywithWords) I_icon_minitime

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